The Great Mystery of Moogle's Pom Pom
by Chocolate Miyazaki
Summary: Our dearest Sora is determined to find out exactly why Moogle doesn't want him to touch its pom-pom. With the help of his kunoichi companion, will the air ever be cleared? MOOGLE SMASH! No Pairings/Oneshot


***Disclaimer:*** This one does not own anything having to do with Final Fantasy or Kingdom Hearts; EXCEPT for this one's Axel plushy, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children poster, and the games Final Fantasy X and the entire Kingdom Hearts series. Yeah, other than that, this one owns nothing. This one is going to stop talking in third person now and let you read the story.

'Twas an implicitly normal day -- worlds were being consumed by darkness, miniscule obsidian beings with breathtakingly xanthous eyes were being slain left and right by a select set of people with severe personality disorders, and odd characters with cryptic pasts failed to see how incredibly strange their perfectly illogical hair was -- yes, this was nothing but a usual, hackneyed day. However, there was a certain something -- or, rather, someone -- who was acting anything but normal. A boy, appearing childish when beheld with one's eyes, was crouched behind a pillar, his slight, chocolate brown eyebrows furrowed, giving him a visage of one who was concentrating intensely. He was of small stature, and only 14 years old, but he had pristine, azure eyes which seemed timeless. Said orbs appeared to be trained intently on a cuddly-looking creature pacing aimlessly about the small First District square of Traverse Town. The boy was training every ounce of his concentration on said creature; consequently, he wasn't exactly prepared for the loud, "Hi, Sora!" which erupted from behind him.

"Aaaughh!" he yelped, toppling over to the sound of amused laughter apparently belonging to a young-looking girl with large, mischievous eyes and a mop of short ebony hair. Upon regaining his composure, Sora quickly sprang up and cupped a hand over her mouth, pulling her into a position identical to his as of a few seconds prior.

"Yuffie; you need to be quiet!" he stated in panicky, hushed tones. "I have reason to believe that the fate of all the worlds is at stake! Well, more than usual." A half-serious expression etched itself upon Yuffie's delicate features, and she nodded vehemently.

"Mmmfmmffm?" she queried, before rolling her eyes and slapping Sora's hand away from her mouth when she took in his absent expression. She cleared her throat airily and prepared herself to speak self-importantly, before asking the well though out, enigmatic, mind-blowing question, "...What?" Glancing around nervously, Sora responded seriously, "Do you see that moogle over there?" After being satisfied by the nod of his petite-yet-butt-kicking companion, he went on rapidly, "Well, I have reason to believe that its pom-pom is deadly poisonous!" Yuffie quirked a single brow at her normally cheerful and jocular panin, and had to quickly stifle the laugh which had escaped her pale lips. Deciding to humor him, and admittedly excited at the prospect of an adventure which didn't involve Leon losing one of his multitudinous belts and going on a rampage, Yuffie took on a serious facade and inquired sincerely, "What do you mean?"

"Well, earlier, I was just dodge-rolling around Traverse Town -- you know, the usual -- when I came across that moogle over there," he explained all on one breath, motioning to said strange creature with his head, spiky Hershey colored locks flopping dramatically with the simple gesticulation. "He... she... err -- it, looked lonely, so I decided to walk up to him -- it, and say 'hello'..."

**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~FLASHBACK!!~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**

"Good day to you, Moogle. How has your fine evening been?" inquired the bright-eyed youth, amiable to the utmost degree. Suddenly, the once innocuous-looking moogle began to radiate a frightening red aura, seething from the mouth.

"DON'T TOUCH MY POM-POM, KUPO! WHY DOES EVERYONE WANT TO TOUCH MY POM-POM, KUPO?! RAAAAHH! MOOGLE SMASH!" shrieked the apparently moody moogle.

"Aaahh; don't hurt me!" pleaded the Keyblade Master desperately, a terrified appearance betaking his facial features.

"RAAAAHHH!!!!!" screamed the moogle, running around in furious circles and moogle-smashing anything that got in its way.

**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ END FLASHBACK!!~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**

"And so then I summoned Tinkerbell and made my escape," finished Sora solemnly, "and I've been watching this moogle ever since." Yuffie blinked at him singularly before blurting out innocently, "So, basically, you went up to Moogle, engaged it in conversation, and it said: 'Don't touch my pom-pom, Kupo. Why does everyone want to touch my pom-pom, kupo?'" went on Yuffie, emulating the moogle's high-pitched, squeaky voice quite accurately. "Then you got all freaked out because of your too-big imagination, got it into your spiky little head that the only explanation for this would be that the moogle has a poisonous pom-pom and severe anger issues, so you ran away and commenced stalking it for the rest of the day," finished the diminutive ninja.

"...Basically, yes," nodded Sora.

"Well, that's just silly!" cried the pitch-haired girl, springing up suddenly, causing her baggily clad friend to topple over once more. Confidently, whilst ignoring Sora's pleas and protests, Yuffie strode up to the center of all the recent commotion.

"Hello, Moogle. There seems to be a simple misunderstanding between you and my friend over there," explained Yuffie cheerfully.

"...Kupo?" queried the moogle, cocking its head to the left confusedly.

"Something about your pom-pom," elucidated Yuffie, laughing at the whole silly situation. "Hahahaha, but I'm sure it's nothing, right?" she laughed carelessly, poking the moogle's allegedly "lethal" pom-pom jokingly.

Turned out it actually was lethal.

"MUAHAHAHA!" shrieked Moogle triumphantly, only to be joined seconds later by Sora, whom had finally come out of his hiding place for the sole purpose of laughing with the his partner-in-crime.

"At last; step one of Take over All the Worlds by Tricking People with Moogle's Irresistible Super Cuteness is a success!" belted out Sora, standing over Yuffie's lifeless body.

"Yes, yes, kupo," intoned Moogle deviously, a mad glint in his eyes as Sora continued the maniacal laughter solo. "You can come out now, kupo," it called to apparently nothing in particular. From behind a pillar, a rambunctious catcuar sprang forth; it giggled and danced on the spot. And so, holding hands as the skipped away, the three most unlikely of all cohorts set off into the sunset.

_A/N: I know that cactuar isn't an actual enemy in __Kingdom Hearts__ (unfortunately, it's exclusive only to the Final Fantasy series), but I just couldn't resist putting the little guy in there. Cactuar is just the cherry on top to any story! Long live Cactuar!_

_Also, I hadn't originally planned on killing off Yuffie, but it was for a good cause. Operation TOATWBTPWMISC is an absolute necessity to the elaborate __Kingdom Hearts storyline__ (in my head)!!_


End file.
